By Michael Kelsch
Another article about Battlefront II you say? Yep, another. 
Emoticons are sometimes used in BFII, but mostly you get LOL!!! There are some folks who abuse the language, but they’re usually booted from the session.
**Klaxton alarm sounding**
And means we discovered our Battlefront II Term of the Day.
boot·ed [boo-tid] – adjective: Wasting any slag, no matter how insignificant, just for the joy of counting how many cartwheels their broken corpse does before it tags the ground.
(See, it is a sport)
The other guys get upset and throw you out. The reasons you can get thrown out are varied, as we will see in a moment, but the above-mentioned reason is one I’m trying to work my way up to.
Usually I get booted for inactivity. I forget to end my session when I finish playing and come back later to find I was booted from the session. For a while there, I didn’t realize it was rude to hold the spot that someone else could be using on the server. The reasons for booting are different from server to server. It’s tough to get booted from Empire Ownage because they will let the more advanced players of the game use their detailed knowledge of the boards’ dark side. The secret nooks and crannies that are difficult to hide in just really excite some people. They certainly excite me. I’ve learned a few of the tricks (typically because they’ve been used against me so often), but tend not to rely on them.
It is important to know when it’s fair to use these dirty secrets. If you’re up against superior odds, then it’s a good idea to do some spawn camping. If you’re getting beat down like Robin Givens, then go take a tank into the walls and lay waste to any spawn campers. Just know the right time to use these techniques. Otherwise I may vote to boot you…
Man, I’m like a tiger on a Vegas performer today! Speaking of…
It’s been reported Siegfried and Roy (not a sport, though rumor has it they do employ many Greco-Roman wrestling techniques) are planning a comeback? The truth is stranger than fiction.
(What does this have to do with a Star Wars-based online game? Nothing really. I just needed mention a story fifteen months out-of-date and couldn’t work it in. Frankly, I can’t get over it. How do you get mauled by a tiger in front of an audience, barely survive, and have the desire to do it again. Roy, we understand if you just hang up the sequined cape. Nobody is going to call you a quitter. We’ll call you ‘smart’. As they say, once bitten, twice… Roy?)
Uh, back to the nerdy stuff…
The Golden Rule when you’re playing BFII online against other enemy opponents is: Do unto others as you would have done unto yourself. DEnis09 is a master of that principal. He plays mainly excellent defense, but can consistently chop 40-75 kills per battle without significant spawn camping. He loads other people’s tanks up with mines and sends them to the frontline to ram other tanks and – BLAMO!! – the battering ram bomber brings their tank back to get some more ammo and DEnis09 obliges.
The Golden Rule will win you respect among your peers in Battlefront II. I give folks mines all the time. Another fun tactic is sneaking into the enemy field on Kashyyyk and stealing enemy speeders and tanks. I don’t get them all the time, but when I do, it’s very satisfying. Not only is it a crippling blow to enemy forces, but then DEnis09 puts mines on your hot ride and you can go off into battle to score or tank kill.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xQmAHWAba-Q[/youtube]
Another rule is play well. Moby just kicks me around like an empty can every time he sees me. He just rolls and dodges and then effortlessly drops a “Det-pack†right at my feet. BLAMO!! Have you ever watched old footage of Tyson laying waste to an opponent?
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZeL2VAEaAEU&feature=related[/youtube]
It’s kind of like that but with computers and Star Wars music.
Out.